30 April 2014

synchronicity again

the day after my birthday I watched "The Emperor Jones" starring Paul Robeson.  today I learnd his son died that day. I'd heard Paul Robeson Jr. speak on campus in 1992.

Bob Hoskins (1942-2014)

the only time I ever saw him was in Toronto a decade ago. he was one of those actors who always seemd real. & he was only a half year older than I am so we're contemporaries.

29 April 2014

time for a break

for 20 years I've had gravel on my roof. obviously that all had to come off to put in a new roof. so I had this huge pile of gravel with which to deal. over the past 2 days I've been shoveling it into a bucket & spreading it around my driveway.  so now it looks as if I have a new driveway to accompany my new roof. 

28 April 2014

workers just left

went out to take some final in progress pix & saw that one of the guys changed footwear before getting on the roof.

27 April 2014

a hat with panache & a cake with ganache

so this weather-whacky day wore me out. to revive I finally optd for film & cake.  the movie was "Too Many Husbands" & in it the delightful Jean Arthur wore this hat. in the next scene we see that she had on a dress with matching design.

Arthur's voice is one of the best in film. she isn't rememberd as a clotheshorse but this ensemble is a knockout. that & the cake made me feel good again.


influences well being.

yesterday was cold & damp & gray.  then we had major winds.  overnite there was some snow.  this morning is darker than a blood stain.  altho I was feeling low I went out to attempt more gravel work in the driveway before the winds pick up again.  but the chill was so invasive I threw down my shovel.

this will be one of those days which gnaw at my skin. I'm not sure if poetry or film or music or food or cat love will ease the bleakness.

while I wait here is a photo I took the other morning.  if you look closely you'll see a moon slit between the beams of the roof over the back portal. the workers had removed sections damaged by time.

25 April 2014

17 to 71

markd my 71st birthday with a hike at Villaneuva State Park with the group.  I wore a sweater I had when I was 17.

the only picture I have of me wearing the same Brian MacNeil lambswool sweater when I was 17 is this one from my high school yearbook.  it's a scan of me interviewing Pulitzer prize winning journalist Lynn Heinzerling.

& a special thx to Jim Fusco who surprisd me at lunch at La Risa Cafe in Ribera with a beautiful cake.

24 April 2014

40 years ago

Guest Book
Department of Special Collections
Kent State University Libraries

writer Joe Focarino
publisher Coby Britton
poet Thomas Kinsella
General Lemnitzer
director Sam Fuller
poet Joanne Kyger

22 April 2014

Craig Hill (1926-2014)

one of my boyhood faves. most often Hill had small parts in big films & big parts in small films.

he was the star of the tv series "Whirlybirds" which was directd by Robert Altman. on the big screen he was directd by a couple of my friends -- Sam Fuller & Bobby Lewis.

20 April 2014

& Easter (2014)

with Phil & Rita

Easter (1948 or 1949)

I must've been the snazziest kid on the block. this was our second house in Elyria.  it was a 2-story with basement that Dad built at 162 Warren. we only lived there a couple of years before building on Winckles.

17 April 2014

one month

without my evening dessert. a whole month without even a whiff of chocolate.


I was watching a movie & cramming M&Ms into my mouth when I suddenly stoppd & told myself "this is crazy." I don't even taste what I'm eating & there's no enjoyment here.  I'm prone to addictions. & eating sweets had evolved into just another addiction.  I'd start to panic if I didn't have a dessert to accompany my evening film. I'd stockpile desserts in the freezer -- just as protection.  instead of cutting a pie into 6 pieces I'd cut it into quarters.

so I went on a sabbatical. to see if I cd.  & to reassess. it was a good experience. I know where I am.  I'm ready to resume sweets -- but with control.

at a certain age dessert is like sex.  it's better if you don't have it every nite.

15 April 2014

fastest turnaround ever

during the nite I didn't take a picture of the blood moon. my camera doesn't have a magic lens.  so I wrote a poem because I do.

after a few hours sleep I got up to feed the cat. tried to go back to sleep but my mind was moonsmackd. I thot I'd put a couple of bloodstaind poems together & send them off to Bree who likes to do such projects. she too was moonsmackd & sd yes. before I cd even take a nap she'd done this cover

which she put online with this notice:

"Poems that Drip Blood" (in memory of Todd Moore) available now $5 paypal to greenpandapress@gmail.com or cheques to Green Panda Press 3174 berkshire rd cleve hts oh 44118.

she promises a small edition so diehards out there send her some money now.

besides the glory of the blood moon here's the rest of the back story.  Todd Moore has been on my mind more than usual lately.  John Dorsey & I just had a lively exchange abt him.  of course there's much blood in his poems.  & years ago when I did my series "Stains"  the one with my blood I sent to him. as I tossd in bed trying to return to sleep but not succeeding somehow putting recent poems with blood in them seemd to overlay with Todd.  the lurid title came from my semi-sleep state. I was confusing the British horror film with a Barbara Stanwyck telefilm. (for my 50th birthday Todd wrote a tribute which combines Stanwyck & blood.)

& one of the things abt Todd that I value most is his ability to write poems anywhere & everywhere & all the time & get them into the world quickly. he'd love Bree & all she does. just like I love Bree & all she does.

so send her some money.  this will clearly be one of the scarcest items in the Gildzen bibliography.

14 April 2014

good news

the first time I saw Hotel Castaneda in Las Vegas NM was from a train & it was indeed love. even in ruin it was a majestic building with so many stories to be told.

here I am some years ago at the hotel with the Century Dimes. I made them into a C for Castaneda.

we now learn that its sale has gone thru & caring new owners will restore this gem.  I can't wait.

11 April 2014

Phyllis Frelich (1944-2014)

when we drove past The Pantry this ayem I hadn't heard that she died yesterday.

in 1980 I saw her on Broadway in her award-winning role. 16 years later we appeard in the same film. she was a supporting actress in "Santa Fe."  I was an extra. in my first scene I was at the counter of The Pantry while she was seatd at a small table near the front window. we didn't appear on screen at the same time. & we weren't able to interact between scenes.  but it was a thrill to see her there as we waitd for the camera to roll.

another closing

Rita & Phil & I had one last breakfast at Tecolote Cafe. this Santa Fe institution is being evictd in another week.  appears to be one more example of landlord greed.

I've been going to Tecolote for the past 21 years. in that time I've shared good food there with artists Ben Bassham & Bill E. Berger   tympanist John Grimes   cousin Regina & her husband.

there is the possibility that the restaurant will survive in new digs. we'll see what happens next.

10 April 2014


over the years I've taken cuttings at 429 Winckles & brought them back to Santa Fe.  some die quickly.  others soldier on before dying. then there are those who seem to like New Mexico as much as Ohio.

this morning I was pleasantly stunnd to see this Elyria vine in bloom for the first time.

08 April 2014

"on the back portal"

train sounds & bird song
cloud sculptures
lap full of sleeping cat

this is bliss


06 April 2014

Mickey Rooney (1920-2014)

I took this a couple of years ago in Hollywood. lighting was bad & the camera without magical lenses so the quality isn't the best.


Ira Joel Haber took this of me in his loft probably in late 1973.

05 April 2014

Jose Wilker (1947-2014)

in the mid-70s his lusty performance (not to mention his famous butt shot) made him a popular international star:

in search

one of the pages I visit on Facebook is calld Vintage Los Angeles.  they recently postd an old short film of a boy on a bike. & its readers were able to identify & contact the man who had been that boy.

that made me think abt something lost from my past.  early in 1985 I was having a hot fudge sundae at the legendary C.C. Brown's on Hollywood Blvd.  a USC student was making a short abt the place & askd to film me eating my sundae.  stupidly I either didn't ask the student's name or simply made no record of it. what a blast if that footage survives somewhere.

this is me years later at that magical place which no longer exists.

02 April 2014

ring round the past

going thru Mom's jewelry I found this:

I know the photo sucks.  can't get a clear picture. but here's the story.

when I was a boy one of my favorite tv shows was "Captain Video."  at one time they made available a ring as a gimmick for selling candy bars.  I got one & this is it. with time I removed the photo of Al Hodge & replaced it with this picture of me with Mom.  apparently she kept it all these decades with her own jewelry.

01 April 2014

Robert LaVigne (1928-2014)

he paintd this portrait of his lover Peter Orlovsky:

when Allen Ginsberg saw the painting he wantd to meet the model. he did & we all know what happend.